My 5 Keys to Mindfulness
“Blake, you’re thinking fast.”
Those words, patiently stated by my climbing partner, brought me back to reality.
“But...how did he know?!”, I thought, as if my tense body and sharp tongue weren’t a dead giveaway that I was completely blind and immobilized by fear…
This moment was a turning point in my understanding of mindfulness and self-awareness. For years I was convinced I could not meditate, my brain too fast and loud. But this experience of overwhelming fear (during a relatively safe climb) shook me deeply.
What happened to my brain and grip of reality in that moment? What had shift my perspective so completely? Upon asking these questions, I realized there was an opportunity in front of me: the chance to harness my mind. And thus began my journey into exploring mindfulness and meditation.
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Here are some of the lessons I learned along the way:
1. Start where I am.
My brain has spent years (decades?!) learning how to think so fast I can’t even hear it. The first step is always, simple and not easy, to notice my mind. Something along the lines of, “Wow, those are a lot of thoughts…” is an effective, compassionate beginning. It usually feels best to give awareness to the habit without feeling like I have to fix or fight it.
2. Expand my definition of mindfulness.
Many of us think we can’t settle down, meditate, or be more calm because every time we try, it seems like our brains get even louder and faster. This panicked reaction is normal for a brain accustomed to overstimulation. And yes, it's pretty annoying. Lucky for us, noticing it speeding up is awareness! Congrats, we’re tuning in.
3. Stay patient and supremely curious.
Compassion is a key element of mindfulness. I can't just observe my thoughts, I must be understanding towards myself while I do so, otherwise I might just trigger a stream of unhelpful judgement. Compassion and curiosity gives me the space to respect and be gentle towards myself while I observe.
4. Set myself up for success.
I find it the hardest to be aware of my thoughts in situations that require the most mindfulness. But instead of beating myself up and charging into an uphill battle, I've learned to simply practice mindfulness in the places that are easy! Locations that are calm and foster awareness are the perfect “classroom" so to speak. Perhaps a quiet corner of my home, a park, or a sunny café table…it doesn't have to be complicated.
5. Connect with others.
I quickly realized I was not alone in my desire to better understand and adjust my mental habits. Friends are a great resource for insight and support (plus a dash of commiseration). I recommend reaching out to meditation groups, talked to yoga studios and instructors... Giving life to our intention by talking about it and reaching out to others makes all the difference.
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My mindfulness journey truly began in my climbing harness. And climbing has continued to be the most potent classroom I can find for radically being with myself. These principles have become guideposts as I explore deepening that practice on the rock, in my relationships, as a coach, and in the small moments of life. The most important thing we can all remember when entering our challenge-zone, in mindfulness or otherwise, is that we learn most effectively in that zone between comfort and overwhelm, and while it might tip from time to time, staying in that sweet spot is pretty enlivening in the truest sense of the word.