Climbing and personal growth: how to make the rock your mirror
Last week I had a battle with a rock climb.
I had one week left in Spain and had already dedicated a week to projecting a classic 5.14a that was just at my limit. I knew I was strong enough to send the climb, but with just a few climbing days left I felt a lot of pressure. My focus on sending made the process feel like a chore, and I thought about quitting. “Why not just enjoy myself climbing easier routes with my friends?”
In the end, I kept trying. I climbed almost exclusively on the route for the last two weeks of the season. I kept refining beta and got better at the crux. I built more endurance and climbed very efficiently. And on my last climbing day, I still fell halfway through the last hard move.
We are always learning about ourselves through climbing. Whether we’re aware of it or not, the process of challenging ourselves - at any level - leads to personal growth. But most of the time this process is implicit.
For example, say I go climbing with people at a higher level and try to warm up on the same climbs as them. When I get flash pumped and have a terrible climbing day, I might realize this isn’t the best way to do things. Perhaps I learn to accept my level and stick with what I know is best, even if others are doing things differently. This is a lesson I learn about myself through climbing, although I may never be aware of my personal growth.
But we can also make personal growth through climbing a conscious, explicit process. You can do this by asking a simple question:
“What is the rock trying to teach me?”
Ask this question whenever you feel challenged, mentally, emotionally, or physically. Look for the learning when:
You notice you’re comparing yourself to your climbing partners
You have a high-gravity day at the crag
You feel afraid or back down from a climb
You notice your self-talk when climbing is very negative
You are exhausted and can’t get your energy back
By asking, “What is the rock trying to teach me?” we completely shift our mindset. It helps us step outside our current experience and observe our thoughts and feelings with a little distance. This distance gives us a chance to respond with curiosity and humility, rather than just react.
Siurana, Spain
My second to last day climbing on the route in Spain was tough. I went into the day thinking “I can do it. I should do it.” I had fallen off the last move a few times and had just taken a rest day, so there shouldn’t be anything holding me back.
I climbed well and fell in exactly the same spot. On the second try, I was tired and fell a move lower. I felt frustrated - not just for not sending, but for “wasting” my last week trying a route I wouldn’t send. “Now I have to think about this all summer and come back to it in the fall,” I thought. “This proves my training hasn’t been that effective this winter and that I haven’t actually gotten stronger,” I thought. “What a shame.”
I had lost the joy of trying this climb. I was in such a funk that I almost didn’t come back to try it one more time that week. But eventually, I asked the crucial question: “What is the rock trying to teach me?”
This question is like a mirror and it helped me self-reflect. Here’s what I saw:
“I’ve been busy,” I noticed. I was in the middle of two big work projects and had just had friends visiting for a week. My in-laws visited a few weeks before that, so we had been hosting a lot. In between these visits, I had traveled internationally and I was about to travel again next week. In the midst of it all, I was trying to send what is probably the hardest climb I’ve ever done.
“Slow down,” the rock said. “You haven’t been building in enough wiggle room between the many things you’re doing. Simplify. ” I looked at my calendar and rearranged some things. I did some hard thinking about which projects and trips to say “yes” to later this year. I simplified.
I kept looking and saw how it was me who put the pressure on myself to send. The rock was indifferent. My desire for a specific outcome had replaced my enjoyment of the process. “It’s a gift to be outside moving on rock and testing my limits,” I remembered.
“You can always choose joy,” the rock said. “You can make this choice at any moment.”
After listening to the rock, I decided to go back for one more day and try again. I had a great day and I still didn’t send. I changed my beta and felt stronger on the route than before. I still fell from the same move, but I discovered a new way to do it. I felt more confident about sending the climb when I return, and I also didn’t care.
Use the rock as your mirror for personal growth. Ask, “What is the rock trying to teach me?” Listen to what it says, and let these lessons guide your actions.
Written by Remy Franklin | www.remyfranklin.com | @remyfranklin
